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  Truly Medium

Full Moon Sacred Burn Release Ceremony

7/4/2020

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Hello Loves,

A dear friend asked me for guidance on how to do a burn release for tonights full moon. So I drafted this simple ceremony.  The full moon is the perfect time to let go of all that no longer serves your highest good.  I hope this script  helps you in whatever you choose to release tonight or in moons to come.

 Sending you all love, xoxo T 

P.S. If you have ever attended one of my Gather the Women Circles you will recognize the Fear Release ;) 



Full Moon Sacred Burn Release
Drafted by Truly Medium 
 
 
Before you Begin: 
 
Please Please Please be CAREFUL when working with fire. Be extremely diligent and have water or a fire extinguisher available to put it out at any point.  If you do not have a bon fire, you can use a caldron or a cast iron pot to burn your papers in. Again, be sure to be diligent in containing the heat and flame. I take no responsibility for what you do. 
 
Gather and place any crystals, jewelry, water or items you wish to energetically clear and recharge with the moon energy in the sacred space BEFORE you start. 
 
Bring a pen/pencil and note pad (possibly tissues) to help you release. 
 
Know that you can/should personalize this how you see fit. This is just a guideline to get you started. 
 
  1. Clear the Space & Acknowledgements
  2. Fear Release 
  3. Amplifying Gratitude 
  4. Clearing and Charging Items
  5. Closing & Acknowledgements 
 
 
 
  1. Clear the Space & Acknowledgements 
 
Gather around where the fire will be/is.  Allow a moment of silent reflection to recognize the creation of a sacred space.  Take at least 3 Belly Breaths to allow your body to acknowledge the change in energy. 
 
Step forward and light the fire or just become more aware of an already lit flame. 
 
Now is the time to throw loose dried sage leaves (cooking ones will do) into the fire or to pass around a sage stick to energetically clear the space. 
 
 
Speak:
 
Land acknowledgement: 
 
[Insert name of city/town] is located on the traditional territory of Indigenous peoples dating back countless generations. I want to show my respect for their contributions and recognize the role of treaty making in what is now Ontario. We wish to express gratitude to Mother Earth and for the resources we are using. We honour all the First Nation, Métis and Inuit people who have been living on the land since time immemorial and give thanks to them.  
 
Mother Moon, Goddess, Bringer of Light, thank you for your powerful blessings on this night.  I invoke you into my being and soul, fill up this vessel and make it whole. I stand before you in awe and love, I cherish the gifts you send from above. 
 
Sacred Flame Spirit, creator of heat and change, thank you for your presence and blessings on this night. I invoke you to bring forth all your magic. I stand in awe and love of your gifts. 
 
 
  1. Fear Release
 
When fear overwhelms truth and love we call it pain. We have carried fear & pain for centuries in our cellular memory. These are barriers of love and wisdom.  We all have fears. We all have pain, resentment, anger and hurt. 
 
This is your opportunity to release and let the universe hear your request. Take a moment to get in touch with these feelings. Close your eyes and let your soul surrender to these feelings and emotions. (Breathe)
Let them be written. Allow them to bleed onto the paper. Write what you feel. Write what you cannot say. Write what needs to be released. Write what no longer serves a purpose.  Write the burdens your heart carries.
 
(give a few minutes)
 
When you are ready, fold it up (accordion style burns best). Approach the fire & say: 
 
Sacred Flame Spirit, I ask you to help me release and recycle this energy into a positive motion to help me move forward on my life path. I choose to let go of all that no longer serves my highest and greatest good. 
 
Mother Moon I ask that you help me to ease the past so that I may grow into the future with grace and confidence. 
 
Burn your list in the fire. Return to your seat. 
 
  1. Amplifying Gratitude 
 
Dear one, fear and love cannot exist in the same vibration/frequency. 
 
Pick up your note pad again and write all you are thankful for. Write all things big and small. As you do you will begin to feel an energy shift. You will be standing in the vibration/energy of love and abundance. 
 
When you feel it is complete, you can burn it releasing it to the universe as well or fold it up and put it in your wallet or tucked away in a special spot as a reminder. 
 
If you choose to burn it fold it up (accordion style burns best). Approach the fire & say: 
 
Sacred Flame Spirit, I ask you to help me amplify the love and gratitude on this paper. Help me release this magic into the universe.
 
Mother Moon I ask that you help me to create and disperse more love throughout my life there by affecting all the world. 
 
  1. Clearing & Charging Items
 
Touch or place your hand over your crystals, jewelry, tools, water or items. 
 
Say: 
 
Mother Moon I ask you to help me release any stagnant energy that is present here. Release anything that no longer serves my highest good. I ask that you replace it with your light and love.  So mote it be. 
 
 
  1. Closing & Acknowledgements
 
With 3 belly breaths allow yourself to become centered.
 
Say: 
 
Mother Moon, Goddess, Bringer of Light, thank you for your powerful blessings on this night. I stand before you in awe and love, I cherish the gifts you send from above.
 
Sacred Flame Spirit, creator of heat and change, thank you for sharing your magic tonight. I stand in love and awe of the gifts you have presented here. 
 
Mother Earth thank you for the opportunity to learn and grow with you. I stand in love and gratitude for all you give. 
 
As above so below, let in the light and let it grow. (Amen or ‘if it is for me, so mote it be’ or any other closing you see fit). 
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Healing & Teaching

1/19/2020

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I write this more for myself than for you. I need to lay this to rest. I need to bury it so that my ego will step back and I can move forward.

I am angry at those who misuse Spiritual Healing of any kind (Mediumship, energy work, hands on healing, herbal remedies, meditation/guided imagery, and etc.). I am enraged at those who are insincere and inauthentic in their practices and teaching.

This piece is written as an opinion piece. It is not gospel. I am no guru. I am but a weary servant of the divine, who grows increasingly exhausted by the façade of ‘Spiritualism’ and ‘Enlightenment’.     

Just because ‘you can’ does not mean ‘you should’.

Do you know how many times someone who is spiritually inclined comes up to me and says ‘I’m a Medium too’ and when I ask them how they verify who they are getting their information from, I get a blank stare.  Too often. (side note if you can’t verify who your speaking to, then you are a psychic not a Medium. Medium’s give proof of survival/identity).

Do you know how many times someone has asked me for a certificate for a workshop or class I teach? Nearly every time I teach.  Most workshops are 5 hours in length…. And then they want me to ‘certify’ that they can ‘teach’ it after only 5 hours….. Do you see a problem here? I do.

I am tired. I am Angry. This is my ROAR.

I am so tired of people trying to make a FAST buck in the world of spirituality and healing. I am exhausted by seeing so many inauthentic ‘practitioners’, ‘therapists’ & ‘teachers’.  Am I perfect? No. But be damned sure you will know what I know OR more than me, before I ‘certify’ you. Why? Because if you don’t have integrity in your work you don’t have much. Integrity is defined by having the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles; moral uprightness.

Trust cannot be bought. Especially when it comes to healing. I am incredibly careful in who I see and who I refer others to.  Do you know why? Because it is easy to get fucked up. It is easy to not follow your truth. It is easy to live another’s life or dream or think you have healed when you haven’t. I know because I’ve done it. I’ve also done it to others quite unintentionally. Which is why I have stepped back from teaching for a time.

When you are ‘certified’ you have someone to fall back on. Someone to turn to with questions. Someone with more experience or different insight.  Someone who showed you all they know and trusts that you will take great care with what they have taught you. They have faith that you will, with your whole heart, do what is best for all intended, not just yourself (well that’s if your ‘teacher’ has integrity).  Unless the certificate you have says ‘participated’, meaning that the teacher will vouch that you spent X number of hours studying, which may only be classroom time). 

Do you know I have NEVER ‘certified’ another instructor for CCMBA? Nope. Not once.
Did you know I have only ever endorsed or promoted a handful of other people that I FEEL will teach/present CCMBA properly. One of which is my mother who took it the same time as I did 20 years ago. These people have such genuine healing hearts. They don’t do it for the money. In all things there should be an appropriate energy exchange and the world recognizes money as that energy. So yes they charge for their time, energy & expertise. But they do it to heal the world. They do it with integrity. Are they perfect? No. But they do it with love. They do it for the same reasons I do it.

I could 'teach' other classes such as: Energetic Clearing Space & Objects,  the Black Pearl Healing Technique, Past Life Regression for Instructors, Hands of Healing, just to name a few.  I do not because I know I don't have enough experience in it yet. I know I can't answer the questions that will arise when teaching others how to do it. My integrity says I am not ready. 

I hate calling myself a ‘master’ in any subject, and yet I am looked to as one in the local mediumship world. I always feel that there is more to learn. But this is exactly why I am a master, because I have fallen more than the student has ever tried.

So, let’s talk about what to look for in a healer or teacher shall we?

Look for credentials. Yes, who taught them? Is there a governing body? How often do they re-certify? When was the last time they taught? How long have they practiced/been teaching? What do they love about their work? What do they hate about it?

Look for someone who is humble. Someone who knows they are not perfect but is also confident about the subject they are teaching or modality they work in. Confident, not cocky. Ego is ugly.

Look for someone who is kind. Kind when they don’t need to be. Yes, I know that this is hard to catch. Watch how they treat others or how they talk when others are not present.

Look for someone with a passion for what they do. It shouldn’t be just a ‘job’ for ‘Money’.  They should be pulled and wanting to constantly improve themselves and how they live.

Look for someone who respects traditions. There is a damn good reason why it’s a tradition and unless you have a really valid reason for changing it you should respect it and trust the creator’s reason for having it.  Don’t let your EGO of ‘knowing better’ get in the way. Simply put, an original is usually the best and most authentic version.

Look for love. Look for love in the way the person carries themselves. Hadakiel, The Guardian Angel of Judgemet, says if you demand perfection from yourself you will demand it from others and ruin your relationship with them. Strive for progress not perfection. If I can love myself with all my faults, I can love you too.

You know, one of the reasons why I stayed with the Spiritual church for so long is because I believed it could become a regulating body for Mediums. Just as lawyers have The Law Society of Ontario, and dentists have the ‘Royal College of Dental Surgeons of Ontario’. I wanted an industry standard.  I now know that the church is much too political for that.  But it was a dream of mine… to have someone other than ourselves to keep us all accountable. To make sure we were practicing with compassion and care.

I have been asked to teach mediumship time and time again. I want to. I do. I have had others tell me that there will be ‘Truly Medium Mediums’ in the near future. But then I wonder, who would I trust with my name? I hold my standards pretty high when it comes to my work. I work honestly. I work with care and love.

When I became a Spiritualist minister I took an oath to “…honour truth, value virtue, and goodness and will set these above worldly or material positions. I will respect individuality and will speak of people in their absence as I would in their presence. I will recognize mediumship as a sacred faculty to be exercised for the upliftment and progress of the human race…”

Yes, I’m still working on it. I am human.  Progress over perfection. But the fact that this is what I believe….. this is what I have pledged myself to........Has your teacher done that?  Do they have a decree or have they taken an oath?

By the way, that quoted bit above is from my ‘ministerial obligation’ which hangs on my self proclaimed ‘wall of shame’ (wall of certificates). My husband made me put them up in my office so that my clients could see that I am actually educated. I tell him all the time that people don’t want to see that.  They just want me to talk to their dead people. Which for the most part is true, but every once in a while, someone asks how I got so good at it………. Experience! That’s how I got so good. I practiced so much that I would become the best. I have failed… Oh man! I have failed and big. But I also have a hunger to grow. I’m always thirsty for knowledge. I created my own conference, so I didn’t have to travel out of province to learn!!!! (which incidentally failed at making me any material profit, but brought me and reminded me of the value of friends).

I guess what I’m trying to say with my soap box rant is, ‘Check their motive before you commit to learning from someone or to accepting their help in trying to heal your traumas’.

Thank you for reading the writings of a crazy lady who talks to the dead people.
 Yours, Truly xo
​
P.S. If you are angry with me and my opinion ask yourself why.
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Holiday Survival for the Grieving

12/22/2019

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As I sit here in my office thinking about the first Christmas without my dad, I remember thinking that no one told me it was going to be hard. Really, really, hard. I was 13, and although I was used to not seeing him on Christmas eve (as he was usually on night shift), I would typically see him in the morning, and we would open presents before he went to bed.
 
The year he died my mother took us to Florida. Even now it is pretty cool to be able to say I spent Christmas in Babe Ruth’s Florida beach house one year. But we all know I’d trade being able to say that for having my dad for one more Christmas.
 
The point of me telling you all this is that I want you to remember to go easy on yourself. Allow yourself space and grace for grieving. Allow time for you. That Christmas was really quiet for my family. We didn’t push ourselves to celebrate much, but we were together. Sometimes all we need is quiet togetherness. 
 
Below are some ideas in how to navigate the holiday season as you continue your life without your person(s). You might not like any of them, or they may all speak to you. I am sharing them with you in hopes that you remember that you are loved, and still needed.
 
 
Holiday Survival for the Grieving
 
  1. Please DO NOT Apologize for grieving. You are allowed to feel all the feelings and let me tell you they will likely show up at the most inopportune times. It’s ok. Remember grief is love with nowhere to go.  
  2. Take a time out! You can and may want to excuse yourself to go get some air if you are at a gathering or you may want to skip it all together. That is ok. Do what you need. Try not to get caught up in the expectations of others.
  3. Re-examine your priorities. What needs to be done vs. what ‘should’ be done. Don’t over book yourself with too much.
  4. Don’t abandon healthy habits. Still go to the gym. Still go see your therapist or counsellor. Take care of your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual needs.
  5. Talk about your person(s). Remember them. Share the love you have for them with others. You have wonderful memories that are always best shared.
  6. Try a new tradition in honour of your loved one. Simple ones include; 
    1. volunteering at a local shelter or soup kitchen
    2. collecting toys or warm clothing for others in need
    3. buying a meal or coffee for someone unexpectedly
    4. sending a note of encouragement to an unexpected recipient (#LoveLetters2Strangers for example)
    5. sponsoring a needing sports team or group in their name
 
Take time out to meditate. The ‘Loved Ones’ recorded guided meditation is my favourite one to talk to my dad:
 https://www.trulymedium.com/free-meditation.html

Dear Heart, please remember love never dies. They are always with you. Sending you love & warmth for this holiday season and always. Xo T
 
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Gift Certificates & Truly Medium

12/15/2019

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Mental Health Awareness & Help

12/6/2019

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Woah, Hey Energy, Fak OFF!

3/6/2019

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Giggle, Hey! Sorry not sorry for swearing. I do that. My mom hates it, but its part of my style. She got over it. You will too. 

So, the energies are crazy lately.  As an Empath, which if your reading this blog, you likely are. The short and sweet definition of empath is someone who is sensitive and feels the energy of others (people, animals, nature, etc). More and more of us are starting to acknowledge or recognize that we are sensitive and growing more and more as time goes on.  It means that we are receiving more information on a vibrational level, and yet we may not be consciously ready to hear it. So I invite you to meditate. I invite you to refocus, and surrender to listening to the universe.  Did you know that the entire purpose of our life here on the planet it to learn? and as doing such we must embrace change. This will presented to us as an opportunity. We can choose to pay attention and listen to what is being presented, trusting that it is truth and we are safe. OR we can choose to ignore and stay stuck, destined to repeat this lesson over again until it is learned.  DEAR ONES, BE BRAVE. TRUST YOUR HEART. LISTEN WITH YOUR HEART. You will not be steered in the wrong direction. To listen you may need more than meditation though.... you may need to adjust your self care routine... or maybe even fucking embrace one already!!!!  Self care is so very important and can show up for you in your life in a multitude of ways. You may want to do some energy healing like reiki or therapeutic touch, possibly some massage therapy or exercise. It often looks like having a dynamite conversation of #realtalk with a close friend. Sometimes self care is having a damn good orgasm, no i don't care how you get there, and yes I did write this. lol.  You see my love, without self care we aren't operating at full capacity. when that happens we end up missing things. We miss small moments of connection. We miss signs. We miss the love that is being bestowed upon us every moment of every day. We miss it. 

​One of the reasons why I started the Gather the Women's groups is because I needed it. My schedule doesn't allow for much girl time. Truth be told, its work, family, meditate/pray, work, family, meditate/pray, work.....  you see where I'm going with that. Sounds familiar right. This is not good. WE need time to play. So, now I have on Night a month where I know I'll get to play!!!!! And if your female, (sorry gents), You should join me. I may be the organizer but I'm not in charge. Ladies speak and are heard. We acknowledge and confirm feelings. We offer advice when asked. We support and lift each other with out judgement and with love. Its kind of incredible if I do say so myself! I have been asked to come to other communities to teach it so that it can grow. I'm honoured and humbled to help others connect. Its so cool to watch the ripple effect.

Anyway, It had been way too long since I blogged & wanted to reach out to you to tell you that your not alone in feeling like a hot mess. I'm right here with  you. And, its ok. Just don't stay there. :)  If your on facebook at all I just finished a live guided meditation. Go give it a try. It may just be what you need for your self care today. 

I love you so very much. I'll connect again soon. xoxo T 
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Full Moon & Healing

4/29/2018

5 Comments

 
Much about working with energy is about having the right intention. With that in mind I write to YOU!

Dear One, full moons are full of amazing energy. Not only can it clear stagnant or negative energy, but it can infuse new life into your crystals, jewellery and life. Simply place your items under the moon light, outside is best, but if it is winter months or you live in a very busy area, you may want to try inside. Put them out at sun down and bring them in at sunrise.... or whenever you get up. You yourself can also sleep under the full moon too. 

I am currently on a healing journey of sorts and reached for this magical meditation to help me manifest the way I wanted my life to move forward from this point on. I have included the Mother Earth Manifestation Meditation at the bottom of this post. It will only be for a limited time.  It is 13 minutes long, but incredibly powerful. Don't worry if you don't currently have a direction or life goals. Your Intuitive mind/higher power will show you what you really desire or what your next step is. As with all my meditations all I ask is that you LISTEN & BREATHE. Eyes open or closed, sitting or laying down, totally up to YOU. 

Enjoy & Happy Full Moon Lovies <3 xo Truly
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Why the Wait? 

2/27/2017

2 Comments

 
Hello my Lovies, I hope you are well and I am sorry that I have taken so long to write to you again. A few things have come up for me recently that I wanted to address with you.
 
I know many of you are frustrated with the amount of time that it takes to get into see me for a one on one visit. As a small business owner it is a nice problem to have, but it is still a problem. I am one person and I have three little children under the age of seven. As any parent knows children rely on you very heavily at this stage in their life. I am so grateful to have them in my world. Because of this I am not willing to jeopardize my time with them and this is why I no longer work on the weekends. I do hope that you understand.
 
Now one of the other things that contributes to the long wait is that I can only do so many readings in a day. I have not addressed this up until now. I am becoming more of a physical medium or channel. What that means is Spirit now enters into my physical body and shares space when I work. It is amazing to see the interactions between my clients in the Spirit.  I am conscious when I work and still very much aware, but I find that I don't always have absolute physical control of my body. As you can imagine sharing space in your physical being with someone else can be a little taxing to say the least. With that in mind I can only spend so many hours in that mental and physical realm in one day.
 
This also brings me to another key question within my work which is “why are my sessions so long?’ Well I want you, my client, to have the very best. I want you to walk out of my front door feeling confident, secure and having all of your questions answered. That takes time. Yes, I could do 20 minute readings, but I choose not to because I know it's almost never enough time. Other Mediums may only make one connection where as I try to make upwards of three. My sessions run 60-90 minutes. Rarely do I ever finish with a client around the 60 minute mark. More than 90% of my sessions us the whole 90 minutes.
 
Some clients may think that this is only a part-time job for me because most Mediums tend to only work part time or have some other career. This is not my situation. I am dedicated to being a Medium full time and have been so for many years. I take my work very seriously. I work very hard not only for you, but for the opportunity to share the messages from the other side as I do believe it is a wonderful blessing to be able to do so.
 
I hope that you recognize that I love what I do and that for me, although I may not be able to remember our conversations, you are not just another number to me. When you sit down with me I'm here for you whole heartedly to help you understand what has happened with your loved ones, communicate what your angels are trying to share with you, and how your spirit guides are trying to help you towards your life goals.
 
Sending you an abundance ​of love, xo Truly
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The Arrival of Dharma

11/30/2016

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Hello lovies! It feels like forever since I wrote to you last. I suppose 3 months almost is forever. 

​I'd like to preface this with the fact that I always knew then I would have a C-section. I hoped, I prayed, I put it out there as much as I could to avoid it, but in the end I knew... 

My baby girl is here. Miss Dharma arrived on September 10th.  She is a lovely little babe. Her arrival was quite eventful. If you have been following along you would have known that I had a disease called 
Cholestasis. Essentially it slows your gallbladder down and then starts affecting your liver which creates a toxic environment in your body for your baby. That then means your baby needs to be delivered early usually anywhere between 35 and 38 weeks of gestation. I was being monitored very closely by a few doctors and they had come to the agreement that 37 weeks would be long enough for me to carry her.

Every time I enter a hospital I have company (spirits). I'm never alone nor are you. You just don't hear them the way I do. As you can imagine I try very hard to avoid them. The people, the emotion and the energy is incredibly overwhelming for me. I was very lucky as each time I went into the hospital my family who are on the other side also accompanied me. They weren't necessarily bodyguards, but they did take care of spirits that were restless and would not leave me alone. A lot of the times when I'm in the hospital I shut down and become very quiet. This is because I'm trying to block everything out. I remember a few times different nurses or even my husband asking me 'Truly did you get that?', 'Truly did you hear that?', ' Are you understanding?'.  

The thing with substances whether it be drugs or alcohol is that it can either enhance your gifts or it can block your gifts. This is why I find a lot of Mediums are inclined to drink too much or inclined to use other substances, whether it's for escape or enhancement dependent on the Medium.  I found that alcohol can enhance it but makes me very dependent. I have found the drugs/medication block it, so I don't use them. 

We started the induction on the evening of September 8th with a drug called Cervidil.  I was sent home to rest, relax & wait. The monster contractions started very quickly once the drug started taking effect. By 10 hours I was in complete agony. These contractions were worse than any contraction I had with my 2 previous births. After being assessed at the hospital the doctor told me I was not dilated and that all she could do is offer morphine for pain and carry on, or to remove the Cervidil & try again tomorrow. I opted to try again the next day. I went home had a chicken sandwich and went to bed still contracting. 

The next day (Sept 9th) I return to the hospital around noon and was induced again with Cervidil & morphine, as they weren't willing to try any other drugs at this point.  My husband took me home fed me two chicken sandwiches, and I slept for nearly 10 hours. All the while I was still contracting but because i rarely take a Tylenol, the morphine had knocked me out. 

I return to the hospital on the morning of September 10th. They had two emergency C-section's and three other women in labour at that point, so unfortunately I had to wait. I was seen mid afternoon and upon checking my progress the OB/GYN found that I had still not dilated at all. They found this quite interesting as I've now had two rounds of this drug which was supposed to be ideal for my circumstances. After a lengthy discussion the doctors decided that it would be best if they tried a gel called Prostaglandin.  After inserting the gel the doctor had a feeling to do an ultrasound just to check and see where the baby was. His face was indescribable. He knew we were having a problem. The baby had moved to a breech position again up under my right ribs. After calling in a second doctor to confirm he quickly tried to remove the gel. This was the most excruciating thing I've ever felt in my life. The doctor literally had to scrape the gel out of my cervix while a nurse held me down by my shoulders. To say that I don't have any trauma associated with that would be irresponsible (I'm certainly in need of a CCMBA). Nonetheless they did what they could to get the gel out. After allowing me to compose myself they asked how I wanted to proceed. At that point we could do what they call a 'version', and manually flip the baby using pressure on my belly or we could opt for a C-section. 

I knew that if I just had a C-section I would beat myself up for the rest of my life knowing that my child would not get a lot of the health benefits of being born vaginally, so they tried to perform a version, three times. Yes three times they try to flip this baby. She wasn't going anywhere!  When we finally gave up and the doctors told me that I need to have a C-section I could only shake my head. I knew it all along. It would be a few hours before they had all the right people in place to perform the major surgery, so as I waited I asked to have a shower and to be able to express some breastmilk for my brand-new baby. I sent my husband home to check on our other two children and tried to sit in contemplation and have a conversation with God and the Angels. I actually wasn't scared going into the C-section. I knew I would be OK whether I made it out or not.  I also knew they wouldn't let me off the hook as I still have too much to do here on earth.

I am very lucky in the fact that I have a good girlfriend that works at the hospital that I delivered in. She also works in the surgery unit and was able to prep the room for my surgery. Not only did she make sure everything was clean physically but energetically the room was beautiful. (Thank you dear Jenny). Entering the surgery room was very cold and yet I knew that I was surrounded in light. I had three large angels over me as they laid me on the cold steel table. The surgeons and staff were very kind and did all that they could to help me feel comfortable.  The room was literally filled with spirit.  The only time I was concerned was when I heard a gasp from the surgeon as he removed Dharma from my body. Her umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck not one, not two, but three times! The cord was keeping her from descending down to be born. If I had pushed for a vaginal delivery she probably would have had some major complications. 

They give you an incredible drugs when you go in for major surgery so much so that once I was out of surgery and into the recovery room there were only a few spirits that I knew were around me. The only reason I knew they were around me is because I could feel their vibration otherwise I couldn't hear see feel smell touch or taste a damn thing. 

This block of information to all of my senses carried on for almost the entire time I was in the hospital. I've never felt more like a sane human being in my life. Lol.  While in recovery I had quite a few nurses come and ask me about my work. I even had one of the two surgeons come and talk to me a little bit about what I do. I'm so shocked at how they don't know what I know. I would've thought that with all of their medical training and working in that environment they would have a better understanding, but a lot of them don't. It was a real pleasure to be able to help them understand the importance of their work. 

Another really interesting point I should make is that my spirit guide the cardinal wasn't around much. He was quite upset with me as I did not stop working when he told me too. I knew the entire time that he was around and available if I needed him but only if I needed him. I also had faith that he would be there if I needed him and that he knew that I was OK and I trusted in that. 

My girl kept passing all her tests and meeting or exceeding their expectations. We were out of the hospital on Sunday, September 12th. 

They say it takes six weeks to recover from a major surgery like this. I'm inclined to agree with that statement. For the first two weeks I was on bedrest not allowed to even walk up and down my stairs. Every day I called the angels and asked for healing. Every day I felt them with me helping me to feel better and to evolve. In that time I had some lovely friends and family members come and help take care of my family and me. It was very difficult for me to allow others to do that for me. I tend to be overly independent and overly strong, so it was very hard for me to except help. 

As I needed to stop working early on because of my health concerns I tried very hard to get back to work as soon as possible. I started back to work when she was 5 weeks old.  Yes, my return to work is slow but I am still working. Do know friends that I am doing my best to work as often and frequently as I can not only for you, but for me too. There is a sense of joy and love that I get from bringing your loved ones to you. 

Having a new baby means a few things. It means that I can't work for great lengths of time as I used to. I can't do back to back readings. I can't host workshops. I can't do big events. These are things that I do genuinely miss. Although, it does mean I can get snuggles every hour of the day. I can watch a person grow to be a person in their own right. I can help to inspire another life. 

My work I'll continue as always. This is who I am and I can't deny that. You'll have to excuse me if I take a little more time falling in love with the little girl who chose me to be her mum. 

Sending you & yours light, love & harmony. Xo Truly
2 Comments

So in the interest of being authentic, here it is;  

9/1/2016

11 Comments

 
I am pretty sick. 

I don't like admitting this. I hate letting others see me vulnerable.  I am strong, confident & totally I charge..... Most of the time. But not today, not for a while actually. 

Many of you know I'm more of a natural type of girl. It's rare that I take a Tylenol for a headache. There are many reasons for this, my personal views on drugs being one & how it affects my work & my lifestyle being another. I had both boys naturally. 

I sit here in the hospital for the 3rd time in 2 weeks, tomorrow will make it 4 times. I really dislike hospitals. This one in particular as I lost my dad here. Hospitals are hot spots for spirit.... Think about it. 

From the time I step on to the curb to the time I leave to come home I always have 'someone' with me. I've had all types of 'spirit' come through; nurses who can't let go, doctors that don't feel they were able to make enough of a difference & of course patients who never made it out. I'm sure you can imagine how 'busy' it really is in my head. Most of the time if I ask to be left alone they respect my wishes. But just as there are living people who cross the line, there are dead ones who do too. That's when I'm so thankful to have my dad with me. He was always great at 'crowd' control. He even helped save the Eaton Centre from the Riots in the 90's. 
You may think that the mother & baby unit or Labour & delivery unit are quiet..... They are far from quiet. Especially in this hospital as it was once the mental health unit...... Spirits come & go all the time. Spirits love new babies just as much as we do. Maybe even more so as babies can see/feel/hear them. Its comforting to know that they always have someone around, mostly family & loved ones. Spirit in these units / departments always comes with best wishes. 

I on the other hand would have rather stayed home. At first it was the placenta Previa that was forcing me into a hospital birth. That cleared up & I was taken off bed rest, only to find out later that week that I have obstetrical choliostasis..... 
It's a big term to say that my gallbladder isn't working properly and therefore effecting my liver, which I turn is running slower than it should.  It means I am becoming toxic! 
It's now a race against time; if the baby stays in too long (going to term) I will have a still born, but if they take the baby too early that can create many other complications. 

To say I am terrified is an understatement. This is my 13 pregnancy. Yes, 13!  The nurses and doctors think I'm crazy I'm sure. I have my 2 happy healthy boys (they youngest turned 3 today), and I miscarried 11 others all before the end of the first trimester. This baby is my last. I am finally throwing in the towel. 

I had planned a beautiful home water birth with my amazing midwives & my incredible doula. My family would be present to welcome our new member right away & shower them with love. Letting this go is necessary but not easily done. I am heartbroken. 

I am now facing another hospital birth, which will be induced in the next 2 weeks or so, which may or may not turn out to be a c section (which means even more hospital time) as this little one is still Breach. 

I'm exhausted, itchy, sore, uncomfortable, fight daily with heartburn, vomiting & headaches. I'm delighted to be pregnant & am really looking forward to meeting this little one. In the end all I want is a healthy happy baby. 

So, if you've wondered where I am..... This is where I am. In the incredibly busy loud hospital trying to keep my sanity. Listening to the living & the dead, waiting for the time that I can walk out of here with my baby in my arms. 
11 Comments
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